Hypnosis #3: The Enemy
by Ctarsis
Summary: Is Cat going to turn out to be the ally of the Animorphs...or their enemy?


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**Chapter One -- Jake**

* * *

  
The newest member of the team would take some getting used to, that was for sure. None of us knew anything about her, except Ax. And he wouldn't say a thing.

Not even to me, "Prince Jake."

I was seriously irritated with both of them. But for the sake of peace, I let it go. We'd all been getting along better lately. That was a relief.

We were all lounging around in the barn, talking like normal people about school, life, fill in the blank. Cat was watching us from the rafters. I guess the "normal" part would have been too much of a strain for her.

Tobias was not hanging out up there, for some reason.

Erek arrived exactly on time. His holographically projected face was grim.

"Hey, Erek," Marco said jovially, his expression dimming as he saw Erek's face. "Something bad?"

Cat descended down the ladder and dropped lightly on the ground, listening.

"Something _big_," Erek said, nodding.

"Big and bad?" Marco said with one of his lamer attempts at humor.

"Yes. It seems that the Yeerks have found a way to alter themselves."

"In what way?" I said, afraid of the answer. "Independent of Kandrona rays?"

Erek shook his head. "No."

"How, then?" Rachel said impatiently.

"They have altered themselves in such a way that when a Yeerk dies of Kandrona starvation, it will set off a series of events inside the system of a host that will result in death."

"Yeerks die, hosts die," I said with a nod. "Makes sense."

"MAKES SENSE?!" Cassie exploded.

"I didn't say I agreed with it," I said defensively. "Just that it made sense. It eliminates the problem of escaped hosts."

Cat smiled slightly. "They underestimate us," she murmured. "That will not eliminate the problem of escaped hosts. Hosts can still escape from the Yeerk pool, can't they?"

"There's more," Erek continued. "The Kandrona has been weakened. No one knows how, or who did it. They only know that its rays may have to be...rationed."

It took a moment for that to sink in.

[Meaning that as the rays decline, the number of casualties among hosts will increase?] Ax clarified in a classic example of Andalite-ese.

"Then this little alteration came at just the wrong time," Marco muttered. I knew who he was thinking of -- his mom. Would she be okay? Would she survive?

Me? I was thinking of Tom. Would he be among those denied?

Great, now I was thinking in Andalite-ese. This wasn't the time to pity myself, to focus on my personal problems.

"I never thought I'd say this," Cassie admitted, "but we may have to help the Yeerks. We can't allow a massacre of --" "Get a grip, Cassie," Marco snapped. "The hosts aren't our problem. The invasion is. Whatever works, okay, Nature-Girl?"

Cassie looked shocked. "Funny thing for you to say, Marco," she retorted. "Ever wonder if your mom will be one of those to die?"

"She's not even on Earth," he replied.

"So that's it!" Cassie said coldly.

"Hey, you two, cut it out," Cat interrupted. "What do we do, oh fearless leader?"

Her laughing eyes mocked me, telling me that she knew I was not fearless even as her tongue said that I was. Not for the first time...or was it the first time?...I noticed something strange about her eyes.

"We stay out of it," I said defiantly, trying to keep my eyes off her. Whatever decision she wanted me to make, I'd make...unless I kept my eyes away.

I couldn't.

"Oh?" she said smoothly. "Guess Tom doesn't make that much difference to you after all, does he, Jake?"

Marco stepped between us, keeping his back to her. "Don't look at her eyes, man," he said calmly.

I felt my vision fade. I couldn't see Cat, but it had to be her...

"Whhhhhhy nowwwwwwt?" I asked in a slurred speech. I couldn't think. My brain was drifting in and out of the haze.

I felt dizzy. I stepped back and leaned against the barn wall. The room was flying around, swirled with mist and vibrant colors and reds and blues and golds and greys and whites. I couldn't make sense of anything.

"Whyyyyyy noooooootttttt?" I repeated, testing the sounds. "Whyiyiyiyiyyyyyy..."

"Jake?" Cassie said, concern evident. "Jake?!"

Marco stared in horror. His face swirled around in my vision.

Cat stepped out from behind him and met my eyes. Slowly the haze vanished.

"What. Did. You. Do."

She looked startled, shocked by what had happened. "Rachel, I did not do a thing. That wasn't me."

"It had to be you!" I yelled.

"Jake, I don't care whether you believe me or not. That wasn't me. Marco stepped between us, remember? I wasn't trying to do it anyway, but even if I was, he was between us. I would have warped him first, making him step away, then gotten you. Which is off the point."

[Xi -- I mean, Cat,] Ax said. I didn't know what he'd started to say. It sounded like "Zi." [I'd like to believe you, but if it wasn't you, who was it?]

Cat was silent a moment, then leaped up. "Him," she said calmly. "Or, should I say, they." That fire that seemed so dangerous rose in her eyes even as she outwardly calmed herself. She blinked her large green eyes. When she opened them, the fire was even more powerful. She looked around. "Who do we know that could do that?"

[The Ellimist?] Tobias laughed harshly. [Don't go blaming him to cover for yourself.]

"You don't know our history," she snapped. "And, note: I said _they_. Who _else_ do we know who could do that?"

"Crayak," Cassie said, nodding.

Marco sighed in deprecation. "Oh, shut up, Cat," he snarled. "You did it, not Crayak or the Ellimist or the Yeerks."

"I didn't say a thing about the Yeerks," she said in amusement. "And Marco, if you knew my reasons for suspecting those...things...you'd understand. Believe me, you'd understand."

Ax shot her a confused look. She nodded slightly.

Just the look that they exchanged reminded me of something. "Oh, and Ax. While we're on the topic of 'covering' for her, what, exactly, do you think you've been doing?"

He met my gaze with a calm, disinterested stare. [What do you refer to?]

"You know what I'm referring to," I retorted. "You think I'm an idiot? You think I didn't wonder why I was demorphed in that stupid bat cave and didn't remember demorphing?"

"You figured it out, too?" Marco muttered.

"You knew what she'd done to us and you didn't say a thing!" I ranted. "Who knows how many times she's done that and you've stayed silent?!"

"You're mad at me, don't take it out on him," Cat snapped. "It's not his fault that I can control you at any time I please."

I raised an eyebrow. "Control us at any time?! Exactly how much do you do that?!"

She smiled. "You really want to know?"

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Two -- Cat**

* * *

  
Jake took the bait and started yelling at me. I tuned him out, making myself a mental note to erase his memory after a touching scene with Cassie sometime. I smiled, and that only made him yell more.

Rachel and Marco got into it, of course. Even Tobias and Cassie joined in after a while. I didn't really hear them.

I was busy trying to figure out why I hadn't let Jake ream Ax out for it. It wasn't like I needed Jake screaming at me. But somehow I didn't want Ax to be blamed.

I snorted derisively. I was vaguely aware of Marco screaming rather loudly. _Cat, we have been through this a hundred thousand times,_ I warned myself. _Don't trust him. Don't trust anyone. You remember what trust brings, don't you?_

Inwardly I sighed. I was beginning to forget my real name. I always thought of myself as "Cat" lately. Was I forgetting my identity, my destiny? I hoped not.

_You are Xilite. Not Cat, not a human. You are Xilite, leader of..._ I didn't finish the thought. The...thing...I had been the leader of -- it had failed. I had failed. Perhaps that was why I wanted to lose myself, to forget, and yet at the same time hold on to the slim, fragile hope that I still cherished. But I was the only survivor capable of action, and I couldn't afford to forget.

The fact remained: I had not been messing with Jake's mind. Not then, anyway. Someone else had done it. None of the other humans were capable, and neither was the Andalite. I'd put my money on Crayak or the Ellimist --

I mentally slapped myself. I talked like a human, thought like a human. Would I remain human? Was I meant to be human? If I did accomplish my goal...would I ever resume my identity, who I was? Or would I stay human?

Was I human, or was I still...Xaralite?

Just the word _Xaralite_ made me want to scream in agony, want to destroy the Ellimist and the Andalites and all the supposed "good guys." I didn't care why they'd done it. They had.

I felt Ax's eyes on me. I wondered if he was different from the other Andalites. I thought he was. But I could always be wrong.

I'd been wrong about my allies before. It had cost me, cost us. I would never make that mistake again.

"Okay, that's enough screaming," I said, raising my hand.

Marco's mouth snapped shut. He was shocked. "Yeah, Marco, sorry but I didn't hear a word you said. See, there's a little thing called 'ignore.' It's a verb in the English language, right? And I was in the process of ignoring you."

Marco snorted but couldn't think of a smart comeback.

"Do any of you have any reason at all to distrust the Ellimist?" I asked, looking around the group.

Rachel shot a glance at Tobias but didn't say anything. Jake shrugged. "No."

"I know everyone has a good reason to distrust Crayak," I said with a nod. "But according to you, the Ellimist has a spotless record?"

Rachel muttered something that I didn't hear. Probably a good thing.

"Well," I murmured. I looked up to meet Ax's eyes. "According to me, he's a murderer. A murderer of worlds."

[Ellimists love life,] Ax said in a tone almost sarcastic. [They love all life, but especially sentient life.]

"Lies," I spat. "All lies." My eyes narrowed and glowed slightly. "They love life? Hah! Sentient life -- a joke! They love sentient life as long as it remains inferior to them! And then -- when it threatens to become as powerful, as intelligent as they, they _destroy it_!"

Ax's face tensed in understanding. I had told him once that Xaralites were beginning to do just that -- threaten to become as powerful, as intelligent as the Ellimists. He remembered that.

"Yeah, you better believe it," I said aloud. He nodded slightly, showing that he understood my words.

My race...doomed.

Because of him and that sickening Crayak and those Andalites and perhaps five other races.

Opposites had helped in our downfall. Crayak and the Ellimist; Andalites and Yeerks...and others as well. The Howlers, Crayak's troops.

All alike in their fear of us.

They were jealous of us. We were so intelligent, so powerful. We'd already passed the Andalites -- I'd concealed that fact from Ax or at least masked it slightly -- and the Yeerks before them. The Howlers? Their scream did not affect us. We'd adapted ourselves to it. And Crayak's children now posed no threat. They were to us as a human was to a Hork-Bajir.

_For the good of the universe,_ the Ellimist had said, or something like that. That was what he had told me, Xilite. That was what he had said.

I had sworn my revenge at that moment.

The Ellimist knew that. He knew what I was, who I was now, what form I was in. He knew of the other, as well. Of course he'd want me dead. He feared me.

Of course, in this form there wasn't a great deal that I could do to him.

Or was there?

I was a loner. I was alone in this fight; the other could not do much to help me, yet. The Andalite would never help me as I did what I had to do to...his people. The humans didn't like me anyway, but I could deal with that.

I always had dealt with it. Maybe I'd been too fearless, too arrogant. Maybe if I'd seen the danger...maybe I would have been able to prevent it...

Or maybe I couldn't have stood against my..._our_ enemies anyway. Maybe I was just too foolish. Maybe I was just too sure of my invincibility, _our_ invincibility.

I looked up again to see Ax still watching me. My heart missed a beat and then sped up. I wondered why. Why was my heart thumping in my chest?

His race had destroyed mine. For now, we were friends. But afterwards... Perhaps, in later years, I would be the captain of my force and he the captain of his. Perhaps, one day, we would be the leaders of opposite teams, locked in a war.

And my heart had missed a beat when he looked at me?

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Three -- Marco**

* * *

  
Liar. I didn't know if she really expected us to fall for that lame "Wasn't me!" thing, but I definitely wasn't. It was just a ploy to get out of it.

However, one thing occurred to me: if she'd been so desperate to make us believe it wasn't her, she could have erased our memories. Unless she had some purpose in making us remember.

She was smart, I'd give her that. I didn't understand her, but I knew that fact.

I also knew just how hard it would be to kill her if we decided that we had to. Only Ax would have a chance.

And had it come to that?

Cat met my eyes with a probing glance. I shuddered. Her eyes...I was afraid of her eyes. Especially when they glowed. But at that moment, they did not. They only sparkled as if she was trying to read deep within me.

No! I looked away, surprised that I'd been able to do it. But, of course, they hadn't been glowing anyway.

"None of you believe me?" she said in a tone carefully expressionless, emotionless.

"What do you think, Cat?!" I snapped angrily. "Why should we believe you? What kind of an idiot would believe you?!"

"Well, Marco, if you're saying that only an idiot would believe me, I'm surprised that you don't," she returned smoothly. "Don't use such derisive words. They always describe you too well."

I let it go. Mostly because I couldn't think of anything to say. "Yeah, whatever," I snorted. "But the point is that you're not worthy of our trust. You --"

"You think I want your trust?" she said with an amused smile. "It's not my goal in life, Marco."

"What is your goal?" Cassie asked curiously. "Why don't you want us to trust you?"

A bitter, saddened smile crossed her lips. "Because if you did, you'd probably be hurt," she whispered. I had the feeling that we weren't supposed to hear it.

The words startled me. I could see similar expressions on the faces of the others. Us? Hurt? By putting our trust in her? What did she mean?

"As to my goal...that's something I would not reveal to anyone except those I trusted. None of you would care unless your interests were opposite mine -- in which case you'd care very much. I have no intention of risking what I could be for a moment of weakness. But back to this Ellimist --" she practically spat the word "--it's either him or Crayak, I'm sure of it."

"Oh, just shut up already --"

"You try it, Marco. My point is this: who would have weakened the Kandrona if not them?"

Oh.

Jake looked up with interest. He shrugged. "Perhaps another jealous Yeerk, a Yeerk jealous of Visser Three's position who wanted to damage his reputation?" he suggested.

She shook her head. "Think about it, Jake," she answered. "Kandrona rays, rationed? What if that Yeerk couldn't get Kandrona rays? And also, the Kandrona is not shut down, only weakened. That would be a hard thing to achieve. What would the Yeerk do, operate on it?"

"She's right," Rachel said. "It has to be Crayak."

Cat laughed. "So you might think. There's probably another level to it."

"What other level?" I said, narrowing my eyes.

She didn't respond. A secretive smile passed over her lips.

[I thought they had rules,] Tobias said finally. [Plus, why would Crayak weaken the Yeerks?]

"They do," she replied. It occurred to me to wonder how she'd know. "Probably it's agreed. The Ellimist wants the Yeerks weakened, Crayak wants the humans weakened. After all, the hosts die with the Yeerks now."

[The Ellimist would never agree to that,] Ax countered.

"You don't know him as I do," she said coldly.

I turned to her, meeting her eyes (dumb). "You know him how?" I demanded. "What do you know of them?!"

Her eyes glowed slightly, a warning. I ignored it.

Suddenly she smiled, still looking at me. Her lips spread back into a grin, revealing her teeth.

I gasped in horror. My first thought was that she'd started to morph. But no. No, no, no. She hadn't morphed.

Her teeth were pointed and sharp. Not like a vampire's, really, but like a cheetah's, a panther's. She stroked a few strands of hair, her palm away from me. I glanced at her fingernails.

Claws!

I staggered back the few steps to the barn wall, thoroughly freaked out. I watched her face. Her lips met over her mouth, hiding the teeth from view. Then she grinned again, revealing perfectly normal teeth.

Her fingernails shrank back into real fingernails. And then she laughed. "No, Marco, I didn't morph. What you see is real, not Andalite technology."

I tried to say something. My mouth wouldn't form the words. What I had seen...her eyes...

I could see Ax watching her from behind. He looked like he knew exactly what was going on. My first thought was that she'd hypnotized (or whatever) me into thinking that her teeth were fangs and that her fingernails were claws. His expression proved me wrong.

"What do you know of the Ellimist?" I forced the words out. She looked surprised, surprised that I would have still remembered my question.

"Much," she said simply.

I realized that Erek had left a while ago. I hadn't even known. I wondered if the others had.

Jake looked like he would press the subject of the Ellimist. He finally sighed and let it drop. "We can't do anything," he said firmly. "We can't risk it. It could all be a trap."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Duh."

"So we just let the hosts die?!" Cassie demanded.

"For once, I agree with Cassie," Cat said. She looked up. "Maybe it's selfish. But Cairo is a Controller. And I don't think she's important enough to be spared. Plus...I don't care if it was the Ellimist or Crayak who set this up, they're both my enemies, and they're not winning at anything."

"We can't just --"

"Jake, shut up, Tom's a Controller too. Think about it. If thinking isn't too much of a strain for you."

Sarcasm that rivaled mine. Jake winced.

"Jake, we can't just let them die," Cassie pleaded.

"They're Yeerks," I countered. "Why not?"

"Because they're not just Yeerks!"

"You kill Yeerks in combat all the time," I pointed out. "We all do."

Cassie fell silent, but Cat didn't. "If you don't do anything, I'll do it myself."

"What do you think you're going to do?" Rachel asked reasonably. "If Crayak or the Ellimist has done it, there's nothing for you to do anyway."

Cat contemplated that. Rachel was right, of course.

"We let it happen," Jake said coldly. "No other choice."

[What about Tom and Cairo and the other hosts?]Tobias asked.

"We can't do anything."

"They'll probably bring in a replacement Kandrona, anyway," Rachel said. I couldn't tell if I sensed disappointment or relief in her voice.

"How soon?" Cassie insisted. "What if they don't?"

Cat smiled fleetingly. I knew from the look on her face that she was planning something.

I ignored the premonition.

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Four -- Cairo**

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News of the damaged Kandrona had reached almost all of the Yeerk empire. As an unimportant Yeerk -- or the host of an unimportant Yeerk -- I would be one of the ones to die, that I was sure of.

I didn't know my own feelings. I wanted to live. But, as Patrick Henry said, "Give me liberty or give me death." I wasn't going to get liberty.

But I'd probably get death.

[Enjoy the last few days of your life,] the Yeerk in my head sneered. [Your life and mine. Today was my last feed. Your last visit to the Yeerk pool. In three days, we will be dead. Enjoy the last few days of life.]

[Enjoy them? Fat chance. And if you're so desperate for a quick death, Yeerk, you can just crawl out and I'll crush you. A lot less painful.]

[And leave a host free to tell of the invasion? Never.]

I knew better. He couldn't care less if there was a free host. He was spiteful, that was it. Spiteful. He wanted me to die if he had to.

All Yeerks are the same.

But Kilan -- the host of Visser Nine -- would live. He would live.

I wondered if he would prefer death. I wondered if he would rather die, or if he would rather remain a slave.

But I knew Kilan. We had been close. I knew his personality, and he'd rather die than remain a Controller.

I admired him. I cried within myself for him, cried for what we had been and what we could never be. There wasn't a future for us, not now.

He'd live, and I'd die. I didn't know who got the best deal out of it.

There was a last desperate meeting of the lower-ranking Yeerks. There were more lower-ranking Yeerks than there were higher-ranking Yeerks, so the meeting was packed.

"They still haven't discovered the problem with the Kandrona," I...the Yeerk...informed them. "They don't know how it was weakened. They don't know how it can be so weakened and yet function in a slight way. It's as though someone wants to slow the invasion, but not wipe it out altogether."

"They'll have a replacement, though," someone said uncertainly.

"Oh, yes," someone I recognized said. "They'll have it here -- in four days." He barked out a laugh.

Suddenly it clicked. He was Kilan's friend, that "Tom" person. He had been the Controller to trap Kilan. That was it.

"Four days?!" someone shrieked. "That's too late!"

"Obviously," I/it mocked. "They could have it here sooner -- but there's some type of delay. You know that some of us are fighting on the Greisim home world. They have need of another Kandrona, as well. And naturally their wants come before ours."

"We've tried everything to convince Visser Three and Visser Five to get us one first," Tom continued. "But as they are at no risk and may be going to the Greisim world themselves, they're more worried about that. Or maybe they just don't care either way."

I saw green eyes staring at me from the back of my room. There was no mistaking those eyes.

Cat?

She vanished suddenly with a confident smile that bordered on arrogance. I could read her eyes. It was as though they contained a message for me.

_Don't worry, Cairo. I've found what I need to know._

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Five -- Crayak**

* * *

  
I stared down from my massive room in displeasure. That Xaralite survivor was beginning to annoy me, most definitely. I could see her using her powers of hypnosis, those Xaralite powers which, though weakened, had not abandoned her. Visser Five had been convinced. They'd beam down a Kandrona there within two days. The Greisims would wait.

Many of the Greisim-Controllers would die, but, as the modifications had not been made to them, the hosts would live. I sneered in disgust.

This other plan had worked for both the Ellimist and me. "His" side, the humans, would be weakened by the loss of hosts. "My" side, the Yeerks, would be weakened by the deaths. However, when compared, it would affect the Yeerks more. Perhaps that was why I felt a certain relief.

I wasn't fond of the Yeerks, but they fit into my plans.

They weren't the issue now. The issue was that cursed Xaralite. Xilite, was it? What did she go by now...Cat, or some such name? No matter.

Xilite was on a quest for vengeance. She herself was not sure of her people's fate. Perhaps that was what spurred her on. She knew that they had lost, but she did not know what had happened. She thought she did, but circumstances had changed.

I did know of the Xaralites' fate. She could not be allowed to realize it. The Xaralites were best out of the picture, out of the way.

Perhaps their power did scare us. Perhaps that was it. But those Xaralites...far too dangerous. Far too unpredictable. Far too powerful.

Even the Ellimist wanted them out of the picture. And, supposedly, Ellimists love all life. Especially sentient life.

The Xaralites were beyond sentient. They were on the verge of being as powerful...or more powerful...than he himself. Than me.

For once, the Ellimist and I were united in a common desire: to bring them under control. I believed in control. And, normally, he did not. But he made an exception.

Fear affects even us.

I stared down at her. The Yeerks would survive, the hosts would survive, and I knew that I could do something about it but I would not. I had a more interesting project now.

That Xaralite would affect my plans adversely.

That Xaralite would have to die.

It was not as though her death would harm the Animorphs. They cared nothing for her. She cared nothing for them. She lived behind a wall of secrets. She lived behind a wall of strength. Her own pain, her own guilt, was hidden deep inside. She tried to forget, and at the same time fought for a memory.

No, I would not do this to harm them. They were not a part of our war. They were my enemies, but this was not their fight.

My fight now was with Xilite. Perhaps she would avenge the Xaralites' fate.

But in doing so, she'd destroy Earth's hope. The Andalites and the Yeerks and the Ellimist and I all had to fall, in her mind, and perhaps four, five, six other races besides.

It had taken many races and many armies and many casualties to defeat the Xaralites. We had over one thousand times their amount of warriors, and in our power we were a tie.

A tie.

The Andalites and Yeerks never even realized that both of them fought on the same side. Neither of them ever even knew that the other fought. The Ellimist and I had known that had to be, had known that such a discovery would ruin our common interests. No race was ever aware of another. Every race had thought that they alone had defeated the Xaralites.

In fact, many of the Andalites and Yeerks had never even remembered the war. Their memories had been erased.

We had covered our tracks neatly. But, if we had to, we would restore those memories. We would restore this war.

If this Xilite succeeded, the galaxy was in for a tremendous fight.

If she succeeded...the Yeerks might be too weakened to continue the invasion of Earth or the invasion of the Greisims. The Andalites, if the Yeerks were not that weakened, would be unable to stop them. It would take a huge toll on both races, as well as the many others who would fight.

It could go in the favor of the Andalites or the Yeerks, and this war would decide the fate of the universe.

These Xaralites had always been important.

And even now, controlled, subdued as they were, they could have a cataclysmic effect on the universe.

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Six -- Cat**

* * *

  
Well. Cat would be okay. Tom would be okay, too, which would make Jake pretty happy. He'd hate me for going against his orders, but he'd be happy that Tom would survive.

I sighed. I was depressed. Not just the I'm-a-teenager-I'm-supposed-to-be-depressed depression, but the my-race-is-gone-and-I-don't-know-what-happened-to-them-and-I-have-to-find-out-and-I-can't depression.

It's a very special type of depression.

I wanted to escape it. I wanted to be free of it, free of my duty. I was sick of it.

So. Go flying? Nah. I wasn't in the mood for flying.

Go running? Not really in the mood for that either..

Go biking? No way.

Hiking? See above.

I wanted to hang out. Mall? No. I wanted to hang out with a friend, but, unfortunately, I don't do friends. Never had, really.

I definitely didn't have any on Earth.

Or did I? The Animorphs?

I barked out a laugh as I walked through the forest. Hah. Animorphs, my friends? Nice joke, Cat, you're getting better at humor all the time.

_Cat._ My name was _not_ Cat. It never would be. Cat was just a human name for me, even though it wasn't a normal human name. _Xilite_ was my name.

Xilite. The name sounded...foreign. No one had called me Xilite in so, so long. No one on Earth except Ax even knew that was my name, and he'd never called me that.

I felt like I was losing what I had been. I wondered if I would go back to being a Xaralite if I could. I didn't really know.

Was I human, now?

Was that what I was?

Never! I would never be one of those...those...backward beings. Remembering what I used to be...the powerful intellect, the power... But in becoming human, I'd acquired an only-slightly-more-intelligent-than-a-human brain and my power had been greatly diminished. So diminished.

Too diminished. Way too diminished.

I wanted to forget that, believe that I was an above-average human rather than a below-average Xaralite. At the same time, I wanted to remember forever what I was...what I had been? No, what I _was._

Couldn't I escape this? No. Did I want to escape it? Who knew?

Answering a question with a question. Yeah. Right.

Helpful, huh?

I sighed to myself. I kind of sort of wanted to go hang out with Ax. That was crazy. Just a few days before I'd hated his guts. Totally. Completely.

And now I wanted to go hang out with him?

_Aaaargh._ Thinking like a human again. I was beginning to hate my own guts.

It was getting dark, and getting cold. I liked dark. Dark meant that my eyes were like lamps. They glowed insanely, showing off the cat's pupil, the huge green iris. I'd kept my own Xaralite eyes. They looked exactly like enlarged cat's eyes.

Maybe that was why I'd chosen the name Cat.

I wanted to go hang out at the river. I couldn't swim, not when the water was so cold, but I could lie there and stare at the reflection of the stars against the midnight sky. I could watch the ripples on the river's surface. I could wonder which star was mine...had been mine...as if I didn't know.

It was in the constellation Leo. I don't believe in human zodiacs -- it's insane to think that the star of my planet could influence their lives -- but I loved that constellation.

I sat down on the bank of the river. I skimmed the surface with my human fingers. The stars in the reflection seemed to shimmer and fade slightly. I leaned over until I could see my own reflection.

Yes. My green eyes, they were cat's eyes. Xaralite eyes. My blond hair was a dark shade of blond streaked with a lighter shade, which reminded me of my own...the Xaralite pattern, the fur. I tossed my head until it flew. For a moment, it swirled above my head, casting a dark shadow over my eyes. I looked like a Xaralite (almost) in that moment.

I needed that. I needed to hold on to it. I needed to remember what I was.

Night. Night was my time. I blinked my eyes, casting a glance around me. In the darkness, the surroundings of Earth looked so much like my own planet's, like Xaril's. But Xaril was now a dark, cold, blasted planet. I knew that. I didn't know if my people had survived.

The blast itself had literally blown my fighter, my ship, into Z-space. I had ended up on Earth. I had assumed the form of a human. I had taken the body of a ten-year-old girl and spent three, four years there on Earth. I had...made...everyone think that I had always been there, that Cairo and I were twins.

My companion had assumed a different form.

I was so submerged in my own memories that I didn't hear the step behind me. I didn't hear anything until the voice in my head spoke.

[Xilite?]

I leaped to my feet. The name had startled me and thrilled me. It had been years since anyone had called me that. Years. An eternity.

"Ax," I said in relief. The relief had two causes: 1) It wasn't an enemy and 2) It was Ax.

[Yes. I came here to feed.]

He wasn't saying it like "I'm here to feed, so go away"; more like just "Oh. I didn't come here to find you."

I shook my head, trying to bring myself back to reality. "Ah," I said, staring back up the stars, wondering what to say. Wondering if I should say something or if I should leave.

[Which one is yours?] Ax asked me.

"That one," I said, pointing. A sob caught in my throat. I pushed it back down.

I turned to face him. "And yours?"

[That star,] he said, pointing as I had. I saw the star with emotion bordering on hatred. That was where the foul Andalites lived. Oh, yes, wonderful good-doers of the galaxy! Wonderful holier-than-thou attitudes!

They'd murdered my world!

Why?! Because we scared them? Was that it? Because we were so much more intelligent, so much more powerful?

I realized that my breath was coming quicker. I wanted to grab that star out of the sky and stomp it into the Earth dust.

[Xilite. What did happen to your world? No one on my planet ever heard of it.]

"Your planet helped in our downfall," I said a little coldly. "But I believe that Crayak or the Ellimist or both erased the memories of all involved. Except the Xaralites, of course. If they're even alive."

[Why would your planet be the target?]

"Because we scared everyone else in the galaxy," I said, staring up, my eyes shifting to my star. "I'm sure you remember your own words when I told you what I was: 'Xaralite!' like it was a curse. We were too powerful. Too intelligent. We could have destroyed many races if we'd wanted to. We didn't. We understood weapons, we used them when we had to, but we didn't instigate war." I laughed. "We should have. We should have destroyed the Yeerks and the Howlers and the Andalites and Crayak and the Ellimist while we could."

[You could have destroyed Crayak, the Ellimist?]

"We were close to being able to. It wasn't our goal, of course, but we were close to having the power to do it if such a thought occurred to us."

[What the Andalites did to your race was wrong.]

Part of me was like, _Huh? He doesn't even know what they did,_ part of me was like _Yeah, murdering an entire world isn't really nice, you're right,_ and part of me was like _Yeah, that thought may have occurred to me, and I'm going to destroy that world because of it._

All I said was, "Yeah. It was."

I couldn't tell him that I'd destroy his world one day. It would rip him apart and it would doom me. His tail blade would end my life in an instant.

I wanted to talk of something else. Every time Ax and I said anything each other, it ended up becoming a discussion/argument over my world.

I sat back down on the bank and linked my arms around my knees. I could see my planet.

But that wasn't enough. I wanted to _be_ there.

Not that I could survive there now. It was a blasted, charred lump floating through space. A planet-sized lump, but uninhabitable.

It felt like an identical, planet-sized lump was forming in my throat. I pushed it back, disgusted. I was a Xaralite, not a weak human.

Or was I? The question plagued me day and night.

"I don't know what happened to them," I said finally. "They could be dead, all of them. Or they could be imprisoned. They could be slaves."

[Controllers?]

"Never. No Yeerk could ever control a Xaralite," I said with a faint smile. "It couldn't even control me when I inhabited a human body. A weak human body."

I lowered my gaze to the river. I could see his reflection, as well. "It was my fault. A few of the Andalites assured me that we, Xaralites and Andalites, would be allies. As captain of the fleet, I accepted. And then, when the trap was set perfectly, of course the vile Andalites went back on their word. It was too late. The fleet was out in space, surrounded by ships of other races, too far away to erase memories or use any power, and suddenly the beams -- we call them _schssili_ -- on our fighters and ships stopped working. The Ellimist or Crayak, of course." I shook my head. "If we had remained on our planet, the doom would have been the same. We'd all have been killed when the planet was blown up. When...when the Yeerks fired, I was rocketing back in my fighter, desperate to bring them down. They fired as I lost control of the fighter and started falling toward the planet. The blast itself blew me into Zero-space. When I emerged, I was near the third planet of a solar system. It reminded me of my planet, in a way. More blue, less green. Our planet was larger, as well. But I decided that if I was to live I'd have to remain there until I learned of my people. I wouldn't do any good if I went back. If I could even find my way back.

"I took the form of a human, managing to keep my Xaralite eyes. When I learned that the Yeerks were infesting Earth, I'll confess that I was glad. If I could beat them here, I'd get my revenge against their race. After that I'd --"

I fell silent suddenly.

[--attack the Andalites?] Ax said softly.

"Probably."

[Not all Andalites are like that. Look at the humans. Among them there are traitors, yes. Murderers, yes. But there are others. You cannot destroy an entire race because of the evil in it.]

I fought back an angry retort. I was angry because I could see that he was right. But so many of his race had done this to us. "And them? It was wrong to destroy an entire race because of its intelligence, power."

[Yes. It was.]

In the reflection, I could see his stalk eyes watching his star. Knowing what they had done. And yet...yet they were his people. And with the people who had murdered my world lived his family.

"Sometimes I wonder if I'm just a human now. I wonder if I'm still a Xaralite inside, or if I've become one of...these. A weak human. But I've been one for years, now. _Years._ I wonder if I would go back to being a Xaralite, if I could."

[I wonder the same about myself. True, I am still an Andalite. But I have been among humans for so long...too long. I wonder if I would go back to my world, resume my life, if I could.] He motioned to the landscape with a weak Andalite arm. [Or is this my world now?]

Suddenly I realized what I had done. I had poured out my story, my guilt, the story of my betrayed race to one of those who helped betray them. I had sworn never to talk of the story again. Not even to the other companion of my fighter who had come with me to Earth. Not even to her.

And I had spoken of it to an Andalite.

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Seven -- Ax**

* * *

  
I watched her face in the reflection of the river. Suddenly it became ashen. She stiffened. Stood up. Turned.

She opened her mouth to speak, then closed it. The fire flamed up behind her ever-glowing eyes. It seemed to spread over her entire body, then vanished.

It remained, a smaller flame, inside the green spheres.

"I said nothing," she whispered. "Nothing."

Her eyes glowed.

"Nothing."

I felt confused. She hadn't said anything -- had she? But I'd heard her. How could she say nothing? But she had said...nothing? Everything? What?

_Yes. She did._

_No. She said nothing._

I felt like I was being torn apart inside. I was torn between myself...my mind...and those eyes...

No. Yes. No. Yes. No.

Yes.

I staggered backward, away from her. I could feel myself regaining control.

"Nothing."

Just as suddenly, I lost control. My mind was spinning.

_Was this why the Andalites were so afraid of the Xaralites?_ a voice inside me wondered. _Was this why?_

She had said that she was weakened by the human body. That her form was why a Yeerk could control her.

In other words, this form had _weakened_ her?

This was weak?

But just the fact that I had remembered began to break her control. I retreated the last few steps.

She looked so...strange. The moon was above her, and the reflection was below her in the river. Her eyes flamed in a green light. Her lips were drawn back, revealing sharp teeth. Not human. Claws had erupted from her fingernails. The stars, reflecting below her and shining above her, seemed to dim before her eyes.

Her eyes...

"Nothing."

I was falling away into nothingness. I couldn't stand against her. No one could stand against her.

_You can, Aximili,_ I told myself. _You alone, of all the Animorphs, can. Now do it._

I would not let this control slip this time. I blocked her out.

Easier said than done. Her eyes were too bright. Even if I closed my main eyes, I could still see the green light beyond.

But I was pulling away. This time for good.

"Nothing."

I didn't react. I was free again.

"Nothing!"

It was pulling at me too hard. I almost released the memory, but no. No. I would not give in.

I squared my hooves, facing her. My eyes were cold. Hers were inflamed.

It was a standoff. Neither of us spoke for a moment.

Finally she smiled in a cold yet fiery way. "Well. Still the strongest Animorph of them all."

Then she turned and walked away, her green eyes still aglow.

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Eight -- Jake**

* * *

  
Meeting. We all had heard from Erek that a Kandrona would be there soon. Soon enough to keep the Yeerks from dying.

Soon enough to keep the hosts from dying.

Erek said that it was Visser Five's order. Visser Five inhabited a human body. He had been visiting Earth for a short time.

A human.

A light went off in my head. I could see the gears in Marco's brain turning. We looked at each other.

He nodded. "Cat."

I sighed. "The question is, do we thank her for saving the hosts or kill her for saving the Yeerks?"

"You could always try and kill me," she said, appearing in the barn door.

I hate it when she does that.

"You probably wouldn't succeed, but you could try," she said with a tight smile. Her green eyes swept around the group and stopped when they saw Ax.

She hesitated, still at the door. Was that fear on her face?

No. Not fear. Not caution.

Indecision. That was it. Did she advance? Or did she turn?

She stepped up to the group. Her eyes never left Ax. A defiant stare was on her face and a secretive smile on her lips.

"So. We have a meeting. May I ask why I am called?" she said with an almost imperceptible note of sarcasm.

"What, you're too good for us?" Marco shot back.

Her eyes glowed slightly. A warning?

A warning, to us? To us? The resistance of Earth, the guerilla army that had plagued the Yeerks? What did she think she was doing, "warning" us? Did she think that she scared us? Did she think that she was a threat?

She turned her glowing eyes on me as if reading my thoughts. I shuddered. She smiled openly and nodded, perceiving the shudder. _Yes, Jake. I have a right to warn you,_ her eyes mocked. _Leader of the resistance. The unseen nemesis of Visser Three. The most influential person in Earth's survival or death. To **you,** Jake, I send a warning. Your titles do not scare me._

I wasn't just reading her eyes and guessing at her thoughts. The message was open. It emanated from her. I could feel it in my mind.

What was she, telepathic?

Or was my mind playing tricks on me?

[Prince Jake,] Ax said tersely. [Look away from her eyes.]

It wasn't a suggestion. It was an order. I might have been angered by it if I hadn't known that he was right, that I was...drifting...

Cassie looked from me to Cat and then jumped between us. My vision cleared.

Cassie backed away as if in a dream. My vision became hazy again as Cat's eyes met mine...

FWAPP!

I snapped back, staring at Cat. The Andalite tail blade was at her throat.

[She has been doing this ever since she became an Animorph,] Ax said calmly. [She has been erasing your memories of it. But it has happened.]

"I knew you'd tell them sooner or later, Andalite," Cat said in satisfaction.

[Silence,] he said coldly, tightening the tail blade on her throat. A look of fury passed over her face and then vanished, leaving in its place a smile.

She looked up to the rafters and let out a hiss. A snake's hiss.

A cat's hiss.

Two green eyes peered down.

The tabby cat dropped and clawed Ax. It wasn't enough to hurt him, just enough to startle him. Cat dropped to the ground, rolled over slightly, and leaped to her feet.

"Cheetah," she said calmly. The tabby moved away from Ax and leaped up into her arms. Cat stroked her absentmindedly. Her eyes stayed on Ax.

"As I said, Andalite," she said with a sound much like a cat's purr. "You could always try and kill me. You probably wouldn't succeed, but you could try."

I collected my thoughts. We, who had stood against the Yeerk empire, would not lose to her.

And yet, what could I do?

Cat smiled. Her eyes twinkled, but they did not glow.

"Now. You called a meeting, one of you did. The reason was...?"

"You well know, Cat," Rachel snapped, grateful for the distraction. "After all, you're the one who arranged for the new Kandrona to be beamed in, didn't you? Allying with the Yeerks? Now you're trying to keep the invasion going!"

Cat smiled. She turned to me. "I could arrange for the Kandrona to be...delayed. The Yeerks would die. Would you like me to do that, Jake?"

I knew it wasn't her hypnosis that made me stay silent.

"Would you like that, oh fearless leader? For your brother to die? For my sister to die? For families to be ripped apart as their Controller relatives die? I can arrange it. Do you want me to?"

I bristled, sick of her condescending attitude.

"Shut up, Cat," I snapped angrily. "Just shut up. Okay?! You did what you had to do and it helped me out personally, all right?! Now shut up and leave us alone!"

Her eyes widened in surprise. The smile stayed on her lips.

[Cat, let's face it, we're all sick of your games and sick of you,] Tobias said harshly.

She shook her head. "No, Tobias. The six of you always hated me. You didn't suddenly grow tired of me."

Her eyes glowed ever so slightly. "I could make an end to you right now. Or, more accurately, you could make an end to yourselves. Fortunately, I have higher goals. I'd rather wipe out the whole Andalite race that only wipe out one."

Ax's eyes widened. [No,] he said calmly. [You will not attack my world. You could never win that war.]

"Couldn't I? If I regained my form, my true form, all I'd have to do would be to look an Andalite in the eyes and they would rally to my side. They'd allow me to kill them. They'd allow the Yeerks to take them -- which would be so much better. So much more horrible. For what they did to me, for what they did to us, those Andalites deserve worse than death."

[They do not even remember!] he exploded.

The cat in her arms hissed angrily. Her claws extended and retracted, her ears flattened against her skull. She stared at Ax and then let out a howl of anger.

"Shhh," Cat cooed softly. The cat hissed again, then relaxed.

"Hey, Cat," Cassie said with just a tremor of doubt in her voice. "Can I pet her?"

Cat smiled faintly. She held the creature in her arms out to Cassie.

At Cassie's touch the cat's eyes flew open.

HISSSSSS!!!

SLASH!

"Ah!" Cassie yelped, drawing her hand back. Red blood flowed from a scratch.

"Cheetah doesn't like you," Cat said with a slightly-less-faint smile. "Cheetah doesn't like Andalites, either," she said with a sidelong glance at Ax.

I hesitated, puzzled by the cat's weird behavior. All animals love Cassie.

"So. Is the meeting over now?" she said sweetly.

There was nothing to say. A stunned silence seemed to echo through the barn as Cat and Cheetah turned and walked away.

[Something has to be done about her,] Ax said calmly.

"Like what?" Marco snorted. "Only you, Ax, could do something about it."

"Wait," I said, a light going off in my head. "That's it. Obviously she can't affect Andalites. So what if we _all_ morphed Andailtes?"

"To kill her?" Cassie said in a shocked tone.

"For now? Just a test," I said, excitement over the new idea pulsing through my veins. "We have to find out if the morphs would work. Then we can figure out how to use them."

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Nine -- Cat**

* * *

  
I stalked toward the woods, a little enraged. Mostly at myself.

Right. One minute I was by the riverbank hoping Ax would show up, the next minute I was furious at myself and taking it out on him, the next day he's trying to kill me. (Wasn't he?) It was my fault, not his, I knew that. I really didn't know if I hated him or if, maybe, just maybe, I didn't.

Cheetah leaped lightly from my arms. I hardly noticed. I was absorbed in my own thoughts. Were they a threat to me? Stupid question. Of course they were.

I climbed a tree easily. I seated myself in one of the long branches and leaned back, staring up into the canopy of green -- or, at least, what _used_ to be a canopy of green. It was winter, and that meant that it was a canopy of sticks.

Maybe there would be snow this year. I hoped so. I liked snowy, dark, cold nights where my eyes were the only little bit of green in the landscape. I liked that.

Of course, that was when I had a home with my foster parents and Cairo.

Cairo. I felt a surge of sorrow. What about her? Would she ever be free? Would she die a host, a slave?

I sat in the tree for a half an hour, staring into the blue Earth sky. Suddenly I sensed movement below me. I looked down and gasped.

An army of Andalites?

No. I frowned in disappointment. Definitely not Andalites. Maybe one of them was, but the other five were morphs. Only one of them seemed truly genuine to me. The others were copies.

The Animorphs. I shook my head in amusement. After me? Hah.

A pair of stalk eyes swiveled up to see me.

Perfect. Time to show the little Animorphs that I wasn't a foe who could be stopped by a mere morph.

My eyes glowed as I unleashed that tiny bit of Xaralite still within me.

Glow. Glow.

The Andalite hesitated and quivered. It wavered.

Then it stood upright.

[Rachel, you okay?] Cassie's voice asked.

[Yes-Cassie-I-am-fine,] she replied in a mechanical voice. I smirked.

Cassie stared up at me. [I see --]

She cut herself off and began to shake. I laughed quietly. This was getting fun.

They thought they could stop me? They thought they could threaten me?

This was getting hilarious.

[Cassie?] Jake asked, concern evident. He shot a glance up into the trees and spotted me. [CAT!]

"You got it," I said, dropping gracefully. I had been pretty far up the tree, though, and I winced in pain as my feet met the ground. But, judging by the look on Jake's Andalite face, stumbling would be fatal.

Marco yelled in rage and dived at me. I sidestepped.

_Hmm...how about some entertainment?_ I thought.

Suddenly Cassie ran at Jake. It was slow and jerky -- I didn't actually want to kill him, this was for entertainment purposes only -- but she was definitely running.

[WHAT THE!!!] Jake yelled in fury.

I was on the verge of cracking up when I figured out that I was really not being very mature. I sighed and closed my mind. Cassie halted mid-stride.

[Huh?] Her gaze fell on me. It was angry, reproachful. I didn't care.

"Hey, you sent an army of morphed Andalites after me," I said with a shrug. "Couldn't we have found a peaceable way to settle this? And by the way, you're still humans beneath your Andalite morphs. You can't resist me."

I laughed as Jake hesitated. He didn't know whether to demorph or not.

FWAPP!

[Human or not, my mind is still strong enough to do this,] Marco spat. His tail blade quivered against my throat. [You try and hypnotize your way out of this and your head will roll on the floor.]

Adrenalin flooded my system. I felt the tiniest shade of fear. No. No. I couldn't die now. Not until my mission was accomplished.

"Trust me, Marco," I said softly, reverting to a more primitive form. "Please trust me."

He didn't move. His eyes were steel.

No way. No pitiful human could defeat me.

But I couldn't use my eyes. He'd have time to kill me.

No. There was another way.

"Trust me, Marco," I said, lowering my voice still more. I met his eyes with my own.

I had to do it quickly. Quickly, as in before he could snap his blade.

A spark leaped from my eyes to his.

He reeled back into a tree. I felt drained. That small spark had taken almost all my energy with it.

But I had to seem tough. Way tough. I couldn't let the Animorphs know how drained I was.

"A taste of my power, Marco," I forced out in a calm tone. I leaned against a tree, affecting nonchalance, but really almost unable to support myself.

When I was a Xaralite, it wouldn't have affected me. But at as a human...

"Now. Any more challengers?" I said with a cocky smile.

Rachel stepped forward. I had to admire her.

[What are you, Cat?] she asked in a shaken but still angry tone. [You are not a human. You are not one of my race.]

"What's the human phrase?" I mused. " 'Like, duh'? That's it, right, Rachel?"

She snorted in derision. [Answer.]

"Why? You have nothing to threaten me with."

Tobias stepped up beside her. At least I think it was him. Probably.

Cassie stepped up to her other side. And beside Cassie, Jake. Beside Jake, Marco.

Ax stepped forward until he was ahead of even Rachel. Our eyes met.

I felt a larger shade of fear. Six of them against me.

_But five of them useless or worse,_ I reminded myself. _You can arrange their deaths._

The mind, the primitive screaming mind inside me, was hard to argue with. It was focusing on the six tail blades, all poised.

I finally spoke, shattering the silence. "Is this blackmail?" I said in an arrogant, you-don't-scare-me, me-scared?-that-is-a-rather-funny-thing-for-you-to-think tone. The truth was that I wondered if I could even hypnotize any of them now. My strength was almost gone.

[You'd better believe it,] Marco informed me. [Now. Talk.]

I laughed in a dark yet lilting way. The tail blades tensed. I kept laughing. I wouldn't die a coward before these six foes. "Poor, murderous, unintelligent little Andalites. No, I forgot, you're not that murderous. You're humans. Poor, _weak_ unintelligent little Andalite-morphs. Your weakness only compounded by the weakness of the creature you morphed."

Ax looked like he wanted to slice through my throat then and there. Personally, I don't know what stopped him.

I expected Jake to give the order to kill me. I expected that. But when I looked at him I could see something in his eyes. Terror? Too strong a word. But fear.

Fear of something he couldn't see.

I knew I would die. I didn't have the strength to fight back.

[Ax,] Jake said finally.

FWAPP!!

  
  


* * *

**Chapter Ten -- Cat**

* * *

  
I opened my eyes.

I leaped to my feet and let out a scream of pain. I sank back onto my feet, unable to move either ankle. Were they sprained? Twisted? Broken?

It had snowed. The first snow of the season. I was glad I'd been wearing a coat. My jeans were damp from melted snow.

There was blood on the snow and a cut on my arm that had coagulated, thankfully. I could see the snow through a haze. I shook my head to clear it and gritted my teeth against the pain. The landscape swirled crazily.

Night. Yes. Definitely night. Dark, dark night, where the only light was the stars and the moon was hidden by clouds. It was cold.

They hadn't killed me. But they had pushed me a half step too far.

I had heard Jake say [Ax.] That meant that he had been the one to knock me unconscious. Oh, he would pay.

I had fallen back and hit the tree I'd been leaning on. I could see a jagged branch poking out. There was dried blood on it. That explained the cut.

The ankles? The fall must have done it. There was a mass of roots below me. No doubt I'd landed crazily.

He would pay.

_No, no, no, Xilite_, I told myself. _You've been threatening them. This is war now...isn't it? You can't get mad when an enemy threatened retaliates. Control yourself, Xilite._

I did feel a certain delight in the fact that I hadn't called myself Cat. Perhaps I was returning to my true identity now. Perhaps I would once again be...me. Xilite.

The landscape faded back into its original position. I'd have to morph to fix the ankles and the arm.

Had I ever morphed?

No?

Yes. I had. Mole morph. And bat morph. I remembered them.

Time to acquire a new morph.

"Cheetah?" I called. I saw green eyes watching me from the tree. She leaped down and landed near me with all the grace of her species. I stroked her silky fur.

I was going to find those Animorphs and make them wish they'd never met me.

Not that they already didn't.

* * *

  
I crept toward Ax's scoop silently. I knew there was an Andalite inside. I could sense it.

My green eyes glowed like emeralds as the light catches them. I had kept my eyes. I would always keep my eyes.

My fur ruffled in the slight breeze. My paws moved soundlessly over the snow. My whiskers felt the air.

He was not asleep. I could hear thought-speak voices.

Tobias's thought-speak voice. I wasn't surprised.

I listened.

[I don't get it. She was threatening us, I don't know what you're --]

[We still shouldn't have left her out there,] Ax argued.

[Ax, are you NUTS?! First you don't kill her -- then you start talking about how we shouldn't have done anything!]

[We had no choice, I suppose,] he replied hesitantly. I could see him shooting a quick glance outside. I ducked out of sight. [Still...]

[Maybe she's dead,] Tobias said poisonously. [Maybe she'll die of pneumonia or something. It would serve her right.]

I almost laughed. It was ridiculous. As though I could be defeated by such a thing!

[Humans die so quickly?] Ax inquired with a touch of concern.

[Probably not. Especially since she can morph out of it. But Ax, what's up with you? You were the one saying "We have to do something about her" or whatever. You were the one who knocked her out. It seems to be personal between you two, that much was obvious at the barn.]

[I don't understand it myself. Sometimes she seems like she'd kill me in an instant, and other times...]

Tobias barked out a harsh laugh. [Go with the first one. She'd kill you -- all of us -- in an instant.]

I scoffed to myself. What did he know of me? Killing them? No, I wouldn't really do that unless I was too enraged to think straight. It was too harsh for a minor offense, too gentle for a major offense.

[Perhaps you are right,] Ax allowed. [But perhaps not.]

He didn't seem like the other Andalites I'd dealt with.

But perhaps that was only an elaborate trap. Perhaps it was merely a plot to capture this one last Xaralite.

I decided to risk it. I had to act like I'd heard nothing of the discussion. Absolutely nothing.

I demorphed. I'd been wearing my morphing outfit under my jeans and my coat, fortunately. I'd left my outer clothing in the tree.

I was shivering. It was cold. The snow seemed to freeze my feet into ice blocks. It seemed to turn my blood to ice. It seemed to turn my brain into ice.

It seemed to turn _me_ into ice.

The Xaralite part of me got past it easily. It cared nothing for the cold. The human me was almost screaming from the feeling that the Xaralite got past so easily.

I crossed my arms, assumed my defiant stare, and stepped out into full view of the Andalite and the hawk.

"You know, I really didn't appreciate that."

Three pairs of eyes snapped around. The Andalite's four and the hawk's two focused on me.

"I mean, I can understand being knocked out. I can understand being snowed on. But what I can't understand is why you would have picked a day when I was wearing my good jeans."

[Darn. She didn't die,] Tobias muttered.

"I could say something like 'I heard that' but since you're using open thought-speak it would be rather like a statement of the obvious."

There was a silence. A face-off. The razor-sharp eyes of a predator, the intelligent eyes of an Andalite --all four of them -- and the emerald eyes of the Xaralite.

Tobias flapped his wings in what I took to be a gesture of annoyance. [Why are _you_ here?] he said in a tone that I took to be a confirmation that the gesture was one of annoyance.

"To blow up at you for ruining my good jeans or to kill you for the offense, haven't decided which," I retorted.

I realized that my strength had returned in the time during which I'd been knocked out. I could do something in my defense if they began to seem...upset...at me.

[Kill us for the offense?] Ax said in a calm tone. [As though we did not have a right to do what we did? As though it was an _offense_ rather than _defense_?]

I shrugged. "You have a point. Maybe I just came to yell about my jeans."

Both of them laughed. Then, at almost the same moment, they each fell silent, as though afraid to treat me as a friend.

[I...I have to go,] Tobias said, resuming a cold tone. He flapped his wings and pushed past me.

I watched him go for a moment. Then I turned back to Ax. "I'm sorry I've been such a -- what's the human term, jerk? -- lately."

He looked surprised (to say the least). Surprised but pleased. [And I as well,] he said in a tone of voice not quite so cold, not quite so angry.

"Maybe I was wrong about the Andalites after all," I murmured. No Andalite that I had ever known could say "Sorry" to another. Arrogance, pride, call it what you want.

Not that I didn't have my own healthy streak of arrogance.

[Maybe,] Ax agreed. [And perhaps they were wrong about the Xaralites.]

I smiled. Maybe we could be friends after all. I'd relax my Xaralite side around the Animorphs. And Ax.

I promised myself that I wouldn't ruin a possible friendship with him this time. What had happened between the Xaralites and the Andalties was nothing of our concern now. Perhaps it would be...someday. But now we were united in a common goal: the defeat of the Yeerks.

I hoped that we'd have a common goal for a while.

At least, a little while.


End file.
